Recently I read an article from the World of cafe mom, about a fairly "new" phenomenon called babyccinos, found in trendy cafes as far as London, and South Africa. As the author of the article would have you believe it's a concoction of mostly milk, froth, and a dash of *gasp* decaf coffee, especially made for mini coffee connoisseurs. The article has sparked much debate on cafemom's the stir; however, it must be noted that in actuality, based on the reviews of parents who have ordered the treat, the drink doesn't contain any caffeine, just steamed milk, some cream, and sprinkles. I myself would be more concerned over the sprinkles, rather than the minute amount of caffeine in what is often called by many around the globe who share a cup of this bad, bad, caffeinated beverage with their children as "coffee milk" or "cafe au late", caused by milk and decaf coffee, a trace amount that would have less caffeine in it based on the amount given (just enough to change the color of the milk) than a glass of good ole fashion chocolate milk, whether organic or not. I mention the sprinkles because it needs to be mentioned... I mean have you seen Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution? Enough for me to ban nuggets, and certain other processed foods in my home, as well as gag at the thought of sprinkles.
Okay, on to the topic at hand...the aggression found in the comments of this article were horrendous. From the author herself bashing what she perceived as stupidity in respect to Italian cultural practices of giving children "coffee milk", to her obnoxious bantering, to paraphrase loosely, of "she should not be forced to participate in this growing foolish trend because it makes "sensible" Brooklyn parents like her look bad." Huh? Really? I was under the impression that "sensible" parents prior to demonizing a particular product would do a little more research about its content. I mean, in many cases "sensible" parents like her would scoff at the idea of a babyccino, of giving a child a sip of Sprite, but would be more than happy to oblige their little bambino with a box of organic chocolate milk, although its been proven to contain more sugar in some cases than some soft drinks. I mean it is organic after all, so that makes it okay. The argument of stop pushing a kid to become a mini adult is moot, when in actuality it is a kid doing what they love to do best, which is to emulate and play pretend, adding to how they view their world, and culture around them.
My point? When has parenting become a game of " I can, and I am doing this job better than you"? Why do we subject ourselves to the growing trend of being the "perfect" parent? Constantly comparing ourselves, and attempting to follow invisible expectations based on articles, unsolicited advice and ridicule of such opinions that are formulated on the notion that Tiger moms or French moms may be doing it better. I am not saying that as parents we should not conform to a higher standard for OURSELVES in raising our children, but what I am saying, as discussed in a great conversation with two moms I recently met (blog on that coming soon) is that there is no right way to parent. What works for one mom, dad, child, or family does not always work for another, nor does it equate to a lack of parenting, or not caring...it just means a different approach, and a "sensible" parent would take that into consideration. Case in point: the horrified eyes of Target shoppers as I left my screaming toddler to his tantrum on the floor. After realizing mommy wasn't paying any attention, guess what? He got up. Wiped his eyes, and dusted himself off. I choose not to condone that type of behavior by ignoring it, and it works...for US. It's not to say that some "parenting" tactics should not warrant concern... meaning, I would not stand idly by if a child is being ABUSED. I myself am not a vegan, but I would not tell my vegan friend that if she chooses to raise her child this way it's wrong, and she's lacking as a parent because she chooses not to feed her child meat as I do. As long as her child is happy and healthy that is what matters. I choose to feed my children as organically and unprocessed as a I can, but a cookie, ice cream, or sip of *gasp* "coffee milk" in moderation isn't the end of the world. Hyprocritical? No. It's a treat. Nothing more. Nothing less. Given on that rare occasion that I want to chat with my little guy about his day, and he has been a great little man for that day, that week, or that month, racking up his treat points. I set the standard already for healthy choices, but I also have to set the standard that in moderation...it's okay.
In short, my intention was not to become the very mom/parenting choice basher I am "harping" on, but to say that our parenting choices, are just that... our own. Parenting is hard enough without the judgement of others. We're all human. It will more than likely always be this way. But if we can somehow remember to lift each other up, and remember that "what works for me does not necessarily work for them", I think we'll have a better chance of tackling those teenage years, and more important things like our children's education (blog coming soon)...Oh yeah...and World peace, neither of which include a babyccino.
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